Old Doxoblogy

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Saturday Satire


'Beurger' King Restaurant

This is a real story. I couldn't make this up if I tried.Click here to read.

Don't Worry- Al Qaeda will take care of it!

(Israel)-In order to fill the void that is resulting in the Israeli Pullout of the Gaza Strip, Osama bin Laden has deployed a peace-keeping force to the area. The purpose of the force is to keep the Palestinians in check and generally patrol the area looking for would be terrorists.
Osama bin Laden is on record as saying, "If the Israeli's aren't willing to do it, I guess we'll have to!" When asked about the insurgency in Iraq he replied, "What people acroos the world do not understand is that the U.S. and Britain, under the leadership of Bush and Blair, are trying to help the Iraqis. We are still considering sending troops to Iraq to help in the peace-keeping effort there as well."

Czechoslovakian Scientist Missing

(Colorado)-A Russian marine biologist and Czechoslovakian geologist who came to the Grand Canyon in order to study rock formations and fossilized sea life disappeared last week while on the verge of discovering the origins of the universe. State Park Ranger, Jeff Boyd, stated, "We lost contact with the scientists on Wednesday, organized a search party and began searching early Thursday morning. Upon arriving at their campsite, we found obvious signs of a struggle." The struggle they later discovered was with two bears, a male and female. Upon encountering the bears Jeff Boyd said the male turned and walked off into the woods. The female however charged and was quickly shot and after a few breath-taking moments died. The bear was cut open and remains of the Russian scientist was found inside. He was identified by a gold watch that had been seen wearing. DNA testing is being performed to verify the identity of the man. The search is now on for the male bear. Fred Simpson, a volunteer in the search party and a bear-hunter said, "We don't want to assume, we want to find out if the Czech really is in the male." Developing....

9 comments:

Joe said...

The restautant thing has my head spinning. It is just too wierd.

Jeremy Weaver said...

Did anyone get the 'Czech is in the male' line? (Check is in the mail)

Anonymous said...

I enjoy all your blogs and read all of yours and all of Steve's blogs. Just have to catch up sometimes. Keep up the good writing. Mom
p.s. I got the Czezh joke!

Jeremy Weaver said...

That's my mom!
(I stole the joke from Dad)

Rose said...

I couldn't help but notice that the two scientists were on the verge of discovering the origins of the universe - but woah, all they found was the inside of a hungry bear. Now we may never know....

Jeremy Weaver said...

Rose,
They really were about to figure it all out!:)
Do you know if there are bears at the Grand Canyon?

Anonymous said...

OK, DUH? You're question has me typeless (not speechless)

Rose said...

That was me above, I forgot to enter my name - I know you don't like anonymous people

Anonymous said...

and I don't know how to properly use the word "you're"